Deceitful Food

Proverbs 23:1-3
When thou sittest to eat with a ruler, consider diligently what is before you: and put a knife to thy throat, if thou be a man given to appetite: be not desirous of his dainties: for they are deceitful meat.

I am probably one of the many numbers in the statistic of how children rebel against their upbringing once they are out on their own and making their own decisions. While growing up we had to maintain the diabetic diet because it was discovered that my brother was diabetic. We were often times denied numerous delectable dainties, chocolates, and other delightful looking and smelling sweets. Anything with high sugar consumption was usually bought with my own money, which was rare back then, and eaten before I ever walked in the door.

Many years later, and less physical activity, have led to an increase in weight, something that I am not proud of. About ten years ago I researched the various fad diets that were being released and actually found and tried one that met my picky appetite. I successfully followed this diet for over a year and was proud of the results. But I cannot bring myself to again follow the recommendations in this book. Until now!

On first pass of Proverbs 23:1-3, the words that quickly grabbed my attention were, “put a knife to thy throat, if thou be a man given to appetite.” That sounded like me. I looked around for my mental knife. I was, and I am, ready to be done with this wayward, demanding, and selfish appetite. I also immediately gravitated to the words, “be not desirous of dainties; for they are deceitful meat.” Wouldn’t I give for a delicious cake donut with chocolate frosting on top? Pastries, chocolate, and Coca Colas are my weakness. Just eat any of these “dainties” and watch the sweet tooth run wild. But I noticed that after all the sugar has worn off that my stomach is hungry and that sweet tooth is making noise again. The sweets deceived my stomach into thinking it was eating something of substance, just like the verse said it is “deceitful meat.” It looked good but provided no value to the health and sustenance of my body. I could not live on pastries, chocolate, and Coca Cola. My body would die of sugar overload.

So after reading this verse and being “poked by my conscience” once again, what is a person to do? In the first part of verse one it says, “Consider diligently what is before you.” Changing your eating habits, battling against the lusts and desires of the flesh are difficult tasks, and sometimes very challenging. It sure is easier to get a quick hamburger and eat it while driving than to order a salad. I haven’t tried eating a salad and driving, but I am sure it is quite interesting to say the least. Changing, overcoming, and battling these poor habits is not easy. It will take a concentrated effort and planning on my part. I will need to draw on past experience and learned lessons from the first successful eating habit change I made years before. I know what I should be eating, how much, and how often. I need to “diligently consider” what is before me, what I am getting ready to eat. I need to plan my lunches, plan my breakfast, dinner, and appropriate snacks in between.

But I have seen this battle before and I have failed. The lusts, desires, cravings, and grumpy sweet tooth have won before. Yet, I know that this is something that God would have me to do. I know that I am the temple of the Holy Spirit and that I should be a sweet smelling aroma to my Heavenly Father – no pun intended. Several verses come to mind that have been useful in other areas of my life and I believe they will be useful now as well. Let me share a few.

2 Corinthians 12:9 – “For my grace is sufficient. For my power is made perfect in weakness.” (Not my power, but God’s power within me is proved and perfected in me.)
1 Corinthians 9:27 – I beat my body and make it my slave…
Romans 8:5 – Those who live according to the sinful nature have their minds set on what that nature desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires. (This is a daily struggle and requires constant communion with the Holy Spirit.)
Ephesians 6:10 – Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord, and in the power of His might.

The correction, instruction, and encouragement are all right here. It now is up to me to put into practice the things I have learned. Diligent, determined, and disciplined effort will support God’s work in me. Pray that I remain strong in His presence and power, overcoming my deceitful desire, and retrain my body to enjoy the things that satisfy and that are the “true meat” my body desires.

Keep Out!

My Bible reading this month is focused on the book of Proverbs. The introduction to the book peeked my interest in understanding moral issues. Who doesn’t want sound wisdom and advise to help in making good decisions and choices, especially while raising kids and helping them traverse this path of life? So I dived in. Little did I realize that I would find such sage wisdom on marriage.

Growing up there was a saying, “The grass is greener on the other side.” It would seem that our society feels this is true in marriage. During my first year away at college I learned a valuable lesson living with roommates and immediately my outlook on this saying was changed. I have become fond of the saying, “The grass is greener where YOU! water it the most.”

We have become a society that looks at others for blame. “I would be happier if my husband would… I wouldn’t get so mad if he would just do… If only my husband had a personality like…” In the first few books of Proverbs there is a continuous warning - avoid the strange woman, stay on the other side of the street, look not into her eyes, listen not to her voice, and keep yourself from falling into the arms of a stranger. “Keep from the immoral woman (man), from the smooth tongue of the wayward wife (husband). Do not lust in your heart after her (his) beauty or let her (him) captivate you with her (his) eyes.” (Prov 6:14-15)

But how many times do we fail in just the simple avoidances? We place ourselves on a path and along a fence line in which we constantly gaze at the field, or grass, next to us. Sometimes we stop and wonder what it would be like to be over there, or with that other individual? We spend so much time looking, listening, watching, and maybe even crossing over to “help” and so little time in our own yard and on our own side of the proverbial fence.

Proverbs sternly warns against such activities. Stay away! Keep Out! “Drink waters out of thine own cisterns.” (Prov 5:15) Look to the activities of your own household and make it beautiful and pleasing. Strive to perfect the very place in which you promised “til death do us part.”

Some things that I have learned in my eighteen years of marriage that make my “grass greener” and that I am responsible for are; quit looking and dwelling on the faults and failures that “I see” in my spouse. Instead, take the time to pray for my husband. I don’t mean complaining to God about the poor qualities or bad habits, but asking God to help me see beyond my selfish desire to perfect my husband into “my image of him,” but perfect him into the image that God would have him to be.

Another area is listening to my own answers and tone of voice I use with my husband. Am I being negative, derogatory, or disrespectful? He is my husband, my friend, my lifelong mate, and not a household pet. Am I treating him with the proper respect and dignity that he is entitled? “For all authority under heaven is given by God.” He rightfully holds the role of the “head of the household.”

When I am mad at my husband because he didn’t take out the trash, pick up his shoes, or put the toilet paper back on the holder I often find myself dwelling on the pity path called “I am the only one in this house who does…” Several years ago I learned the verse in 2 Corinthians 10:5 that says, “Take captive every thought and make it obedient to Christ.” Knowing that my thoughts are wrong as I travel down this “pity path,” I pray this verse and ask God to change my thoughts and my heart in this area. I even ask God to help me with correcting this bothersome behavior or habit with the right heart attitude and without argumentative words. There have been times when I have been convicted enough about my own habits that I knew within my heart that I would be wrong at that moment to address my spouse. Just like the story of Queen Esther, timing and preparation are key to the positive reception of change.

I must admit that I am not perfect. There are times that I speak harshly before I have had time to “listen to the aid of the Holy Spirit” and I have had to apologize and confess that I was wrong in my word choices and tone of voice. There are times I have caught myself thinking about another person and what their life is like. And yet God is so good. “He will call to remembrance those things that he has taught me;” In the scriptures, or past problems handled properly.

I am continually reminded that it is my duty and responsibility to see that I am doing everything possible to “make the grass greener” in my marriage. “Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can train the younger women to love their husband and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God. “ (Titus 2:3-5)

Wife of Thy Youth

"Drink waters out of thine own cistern, and running waters out of thine own well. Let thy fountains be dispersed abroad, and rivers of waters in the streets. Let them be only thine own, and not strangers’ with thee. Let thy fountain be blessed; and rejoice with the wife of thy youth. Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love. And why wilt thou, my son, be ravished with a strange woman. And embrace the bosom of a stranger? For the ways of man are before the eyes of the Lord, and he pondereth all his goings. His own iniquities shall take the wicked himself, and he shall be holden with the cords of his sins. He shall die without instruction; and in the greatness of his folly he shall go astray.” Proverbs 5:15-24

As a newly wed I recall the security I felt in my marriage. I was in love. My husband loved me and I loved him. I felt comfortable enough to be flirtatious with other men. Joking often about sensual things. Until one day when the words I learned as a child came into mind. “Anyone who looks at a woman (man) lustfully has already committed adultery with her (him) in his (her) heart.” (Matthew 5:28)

What was I doing? What was I doing to the men? What was I doing to our marriage? My job? My reputation? The reputation of the men? I was not only placing myself in an unsafe, unhealthy, and in a dangerous position, but I was creating the same for the men.

Proverbs constantly speaks to the men about unhealthy relationships with “strangers” or “another’s wife” or with “prostitutes.” Yet, we as wives can gleam a lot of wisdom and advise from these same verses in Proverbs. We should not cause our husbands to go looking at other women to be satisfied, to find admiration, respect, and love.

Are we, as the “wife of thy youth,” creating cause for our husbands to desire none other? Are we, as “the wife of thy youth,” listening and longing after our husbands. Are we like the hind, the deer, who listens intently for the call of her mate, and once found, remains faithful until death? Are we found as “pleasant roe;” as pleasing as the finest of foods?

Are we an aroma of love, pleasing to look at, touch, and taste in all our physical, emotional, and spiritual being? Do we give cause to such affection and admiration? Do we pray for our husbands, asking God to grant them the wisdom to lead our family, manage the household finances, and provide for our basic needs and financial support? Do we strive to provide a house in which he desires to return home; a household that is content in the roles in which we have been blessed? Do we pray for ourself, asking God to create in us a desire for our husbands and a desire to share our life, our affections, and our physical and spiritual being?

Are our lips as sweet as honey and dripping with loving kindness, admiration, and respect? Are we giving cause for our husbands to desire none other? To look not elsewhere to be satisfied and content? “For love is as strong as death, its jealousy unyielding as the grave. It burns like blazing fire, like a mighty flame.” (Song 8:6) Are we stoking the fires of our own “flame of love?"

Treasure Hunting

The following is in response to the question, "What gem have you found?"

I found Proverbs 24:13-14.

My son (daughter), eat thou honey, because it is good; and the honeycomb, which is sweet to they taste; so shall the knowledge of wisdom be unto thy soul; when thou hast found it, then there shall be a reward, and thy expectation shall not be cut off.

I was intrigued that the honeycomb was written into this text, or proverb. I understand the sweet taste of the honey and how it relates to the even, but not all inclusive, simple discovery of Christ, and the wisdom and knowledge found in Him. There is a great reward in eternity. There is great expectation at His providing, protection, healing, and second coming. But why is the honeycomb mentioned? My memory recalls a waxy taste with no real flavor. So what did my inquisitive mind find?

I found that the early European settlers brought the honeybee over for selfish reasons. They wanted “good-quality wax” for making candles and for the sweet tasting honey that the honey bees produced. They felt these things were essential to the existence of their life, in an untamed and virgin land.

So what I found was that you should not only dig into God’s word everyday for its nutritional value for the depth of the riches of the wisdom and knowledge of God, but for the light that it provides in and around your life. The byproduct of feasting on the word of God is the light that it produces in your life; the lamp unto your feet and the light unto your path; lamps of wisdom, lanterns of love, sparks of sharing, and floodlights of liberty. Walking in the pathway of God’s guiding light. Seeing the deception of the enemy. Looking to the hill from whence God’s abiding love shines bright as a blazing fire for all the world to see.

A New Year

Teach us to number our days aright, that we may gain a heart of wisdom. Psalm 90:12

The new year has finally come. The early rise to the morning has come even faster than the new year, of course that is not surprising since there are less hours before morning than a new year. The house is quiet and the dawn begins to break. What a time to reflect on last year. A time to flip through my journal and read the wondrous works, blessings, trials, triumphs, and prayers of last year. A time to review the many verses that God taught me with, laid on my heart, or counseled me with; a time to reflect on my finite state and God’s infinite, eternal, and glorious state; and a time to reflect on the many prayers that were made. O Lord, teach me to number my days aright as I reflect back on the days of my youth, on the immaturity of my spirit, of the foolish things in my heart, of the weakness of my hands, of the wickedness in my heart, and of the mere small lifespan of my life.

O Lord, may my eyes focus on Your hill, in which my help cometh. May I see the glorious light of Your love which burns for all the world to see. May my lips speak Your praise and proclaim Your Majesty, Your Holiness, and Your Wisdom and may they never falter or fail in sharing You with others in word. O Lord, use my hands and feet. May they be fitted with the preparation of the gospel of peace, may they tread the streets, the suburbs, the cities, the hills, and valleys in search of those bound by the fear of death. May I be an instrument used by You to free others from this bondage of fear and constant state of restlessness and uncertainty.

O Lord, teach me to number my days. May each day be filled with wonder as I discover more and more of You. May my heart be filled with Your Glory and Wonder, broken and spilled out for others to see and know the God of all Creation, the King, the Shepherd, the Son, the Father. O Lord, teach me to number my days as I, also, groan inwardly for the day of redemption, in which “every knee shall bow and every tongue confess, that Jesus Christ is Lord.”